2River of Life Exercise | onbeing.org
Before one of his poetry readings at the On Being Gathering, David
Whyte quoted these famous lines from poet Antonio Machado:
“Caminante, no hay camino,
se hace camino al andar.
Al andar se hace camino ... ”
“Pathmaker, there is no path,
You make the path by walking.
By walking, you make the path ... ”
Machado’s reminder is simultaneously daunting and comforting
— both a call to step forward into uncharted territory, as well as
reassurance that there’s no right way to walk the wilderness of your
own life.
In walking your path, it can be helpful to look back on the shape it has
already taken — to take inventory of all the moments and people that
have honed you into who you are today.
This River of Life exercise is designed to help you reflect and
discover where you’ve come from.
Give yourself at least 30 minutes to work through it.
This activity was originally developed by Joyce Mercer. It is edited
and adapted with permission.
3River of Life Exercise | onbeing.org
Step 01: Reflect
Think about the course of your life. Take a moment to consider the
following questions:
• If your life were a river, what shape would it take?
• Where are the bends and turns, when your situation or
perspective changed? Was the transition smooth or sudden?
• Are there rocks or boulders — obstacles or life-altering
moments — falling into your river?
• Are there points at which it flows powerfully and purposefully
or slows to a trickle?
Step 02: Frame
On the last page of this guide, begin to chart your river of life with
its bends and turns, smooth waters and rough spots, strength and
vitality.
• Label your approximate age and/or dates along the flow of
your river.
• Identify various key events in your life that shape your story
— the boulders in the river or places where the river changes
course.
• If you were to divide your life journey into sections, where
would the divisions occur?
• Name each section of your life river.
4River of Life Exercise | onbeing.org
Step 03: Guide
Think about the various people who have accompanied you along
this river’s journey. Record these key relationships and losses in the
appropriate places on your river of life. If you wish, you can also record
thoughts and feelings attached to these relationships.
• What relationships have been most significant at different
positions in your life?
• Who has most shaped you?
• Have there been significant losses of relationships along the
way?
• What groups or communities of people were most important?
Step 04: Contextualize
Reflect on your life’s journey and trajectory. Using words and/
or symbols, place life events in the appropriate locations on your
diagram.
• Are there times of significant pain or suffering — yours or
others’ — that shape the flow of your life river?
• What was going on in the world — locally, regionally, or around
the world — that shape the flow of your life river?
5River of Life Exercise | onbeing.org
Step 05: Evaluate
Note what has been important to you.
• What values, commitments, causes, or principles were most
important to you at a given point in your life?
• Toward what goals, if any, were your primary energies
directed? Or, metaphorically speaking, what purposes and
ends helped to shape the flow of life waters at a given time in
your experience?
As you finish depicting your river of life, review the whole diagram.
Do its symbols and words seem to portray how you think and feel
about the whole of your life? Is there some important element left
out? Make adjustments as needed. Remember that no diagram can
possibly capture all that shapes your journey.
You can share your River of Life with others or simply use it as a tool
for personal reflection.
